Cholesterol | What Up, Vienna?

19Sep/090

breaking health news (and a few other things)

My doctor called me. I have good news and bad news. Good news is my cholesterol went down a whopping 60 points with absolutely no effort on my part. It was getting close to the high side when I saw him last and this has sent me back into normalsville. High fives all around. Now for the bad news. Are you sitting down? Apparently... I seem to be vitamin D deficient. You're probably asking yourself or the internet... What does that mean? I will answer that question for you.. Nothing to really write home about. Unless you feel like oldschooling it up and writing a nice letter back home.

"Dear Home,

Michelle Biloon seems to be Vitamin D deficient. I think she needs to drink more milk in the sun with no sunscreen on. And please remember to write her family a sympathy card when she dies of skin cancer.

Fondest regards,

Dr. Idiot"

So I am not opting for that drinking milk / hanging out in the sun combo. My doctor has advised me to take 8000 iu of Vitamin D drops every day. That is four times the amount recommended on the bottle! And, no, it doesn't get you high. Then again, I was just dropping it into Kool-Aid. Maybe I should try some gin.

And in other news, I feel compelled to report that I had my last day at work a week early. It was not by my choice. I won't go into details but let's just say that my boss and I never really got along. I think we differed on the grounds that I am a very talented, worthwhile, professional human being and he is a douchebag. I really can think of no other reason why you would terminate somebody's contract a week before their last day when they originally gave three months notice so you would have enough time to prepare for the eventual departure. Oh, well. It actually worked out for the better because as it turns out, I seemed to have a lot of errands to run. I should have always had had an extra week of not working before I left. I don't know what I was thinking. I would not have been able to finish all my to-dos what with next week's goodbye show having, Judge Judy taping going to and Disneyland rabblerousin'.

So here I am now at my parents' place in Sun City, AZ. I will be leaving on a plane on Monday leaving my car behind. My stepfather has already made mention of taking the stickers off my bumper. I thought about it and offered, "Well, you can give me $20 for every sticker you take off." Success! I think my stickers will be safe.

So I have more week left. One week from now, I will be on a plane to Austria. It hurts my brain to think about it. I might as well be moving to Mars. Even though Alex is there and tells me about what he sees and does every day, it still seems so surreal for me to be there. It's like finding out what happens after you die. I can't imagine it but I know I'm going to know one day what it is. And next week is that day everybody. The finding out about living in Vienna part, not finding out what happens after you die. Damn! I just jinxed myself. Great, I'm going to have to take four Xanax now just to make it through this flight.

Stay tuned for upcoming huge news from Alex. I won't spoil it.